Run Time – A Haibun and Runfession #12, July 2020

I press the button right before our feet step off the driveway – Run Time! This has become our nightly ritual – our mother/daughter walks becoming mother/daughter runs over the span of this summer. I wanted our time together to give me a portal into your world – my own TARDIS into teenager-hood. 

Instead, we went from walking to running then sprinting – at least for me. Your time went from a 20 minute mile to a 17 minute mile and then a 12 minute mile. This is my regular middle of the pack pace, a pace I love and can do forever even while talking. But you, my dear daughter, pushed the pace and me – faster and faster. Your current time is a 10 minute mile – too fast for your old mum to catch you and ask about the two hour talk you had with your friend who’s a boy. 

Today, you almost broke into a 9 minute mile, but instead, you slowed down and waited for me to catch up, noting how much slower I am running. “Is this what happens when you get older?” you ask. Does she glimpse her future through the portal of my sweat stained face?  We walk the rest of the mile, time unknown, the portal propped open.

Summer sun fading

Time passes through the portal 

The sunflower weeps

In the spirit of Renard’s post, I am not going to apologizing for not posting at all in the past week. To be honest, I didn’t even realize it had been over a week since my last post. It was only when I realized that I had missed two prompts from Patrick and Sadje that I looked at my calendar – oh, how time files when you’re feeling stressed!

This haibun and runfession incorporates Patrick’s Pic and a Word Challenge #242 – Time and #243 – Portal (I’m still on the streak!!). It’s not a traditional haibun, but it does capture a new tradition for my daughter and I which I will gladly runfess! Thanks to Marcia for the Runfession forum – I didn’t get a chance to link up this month, but I’ll catch up for next!

Forgive me Brooks for I have sinned….

I runfess….my daughter is now running faster than me and has logged more miles than I have in the past month. I am proud of her yet frustrated at myself for not being as consistent as she has. On the days when we can’t run outside, she runs on the treadmill downstairs or runs around the house (literally, she is running up and down the stairs, doing laps around the kitchen island, running in circles around her siblings) while I’m making dinner or doing laundry or doing some other mom-ming duty. These are the things that I put aside when I run with her outside. While I do cherish the one on one time I can spend with her, this usually means dinner is later or I’m folding laundry until midnight. Still, I love seeing her persistence and pride in getting her mile in and getting faster.

I runfess….I’ve set a goal of hitting 100 miles in August. It’s sinking in that we are already a week in and I haven’t meet my weekly mileage for this past week. I know this is due to stressing out about whether to send my kids to school or not. I have been doing research on the computer, talking to local friends who are doctors or teachers about what they’re doing, reaching out to people for their take on the situation. It’s a lot of information and I have not yet made peace with our decision which is due tomorrow. This week though, I am getting back on track! I’ll report back at the end of August!

I runfess…I really miss races! Let me clarify, I really miss the EXPO before big races! I loved getting the free stuff and trying out new gels and drinks, getting great discounts for signing up for races. I loved meeting up with other MRTT/SRTT members and “carb loading” after getting our swag. I even loved getting the race shirt that never seemed to fit right. There was always that buzzing excitement of all these people coming together for one purpose. There is really nothing like it! I miss that.

There are so many things I miss about “pre-pandemic running.” There are so many things I miss about “pre-pandemic life”!! Still, this time has brought about some positive changes (as well as some negative). This coming month, I’m choosing to focus on these positives. Like the sunflower that re-orients itself to the east at night so it can catch the first rays of the sunrise, I am re-orienting my mindset after making this stressful school decision. Here’s to the sunrise!

©️ 2020 iido

Flushed – A Quadrille and April Runfession #9

My face flushed from this furious run 

My eyes reddened by saline streaming south 

My tongue tastes salt from sweaty tears or tearful sweat 

My shoulders alternate between tensely touching my ears and depressingly drooping

Hamster wheel running provides the only approved escape route

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April is coming to an end. It’s been a month since the shelter in place order has been in effect in our area. That’s a month of not being able to physically be in school, get together with friends, go on a group run. That’s a month of virtual learning or cyber learning or distancing learning or not learning. That’s a month of missed birthdays, missed trips to the play ground, missed races.  April is coming to an end when it seems like it never even got started. 

Forgive me, Nike, for I have sinned….

Ma Irma

 

I runfess…I have not been “just doing it”. If you look at my mileage for March and April, it is quite pitiful compared to the strong start I had in January and February. I think I’ve been in “shock” even though everyone else in the family seems to have adjusted to the shelter in place order.  I was trying really hard to get the kids to do their school work, make home made healthy meals every day, stay on top of laundry and cleaning  – basically, being all “Little House on the Prairie” . I never saw Ma needing a run because she needed a break from Pa and Laura and Mary and Baby Carrie and the cooking and cleaning on the farmstead.

I runfess…I’m no Ma Ingalls! I need to workout to keep my sanity while doing all those other things. So, I’ve slowly been getting back into a regular running schedule. Since I’m not morning person, this has meant going to bed really, really, really late. By the time the kids are in bed, the dishes done, the house cleaned up and things prepped for the next day (plus logging onto WordPress and getting some writing in), I’m not heading down to the treadmill until around 11 PM.  I don’t think I’ve been able to get to bed before 1 AM the past few days!

(This picture on the right is from when I visited the Laura Ingalls Wilder Museum in Walnut Grove, MN.  I loved watching Little House on the Prairie growing up so this was a highlight on our cross-country trip. But as you can see, frontier life is not for me! If the bonnet doesn’t fit….)

 

On the positive side though – I’ve reached 200 miles this year for the Run The Year Challenge! Realistically, I probably won’t be able to finish 2020 miles this year, but I’m going to see how many miles I can get in. Not having my SRTT/MRTT group to run with has been so hard…but seeing their posts about their sola runs have continued to be inspiring and motivating! IMG_5821

I runfess…I’ve been crying after my runs (the inspiration for my poem which was written for Mish at dVerse Quadrille #102 – Flush). I’ve been keeping it together during the day with the kids but these nightly runs and crying sessions have been very cathartic. It’s like the feeling I get after I’ve finished a particularly grueling race or run. This shelter in place has felt like running a marathon very day for the last 35 days…except my butt seems to be growing instead of shrinking….

Not a very upbeat or inspirational runfession for this month but an honest one – isn’t that what runfessions are for? Thanks for this forum, Marcia at Marcia’s Healthy Slice!

Until next time….I’m still writing and running and raising these kids the best I can…plus, my jeans do still fit….

 

© 2020 iido

Saturday – An Acrostic Poem and March Runfession #8

Saturday mornings begin best with

Awakening while the sun still sleeps, dressing then

Trotting down the stairs with sneakers in hand, quietly making a PB and J yet

Ultimately waking the youngest ones with the coffee pot’s final hiss,

Rushing to get them back to bed then, quickly into the car, fueling and hydrating

(me not the car)

Driving to a favorite trail, late, but relieved that my tribe waited for me to

Arrive before starting on our group run. 

Yes, this is the best way to begin a Saturday. 

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I wrote this poem last week for Jamie Dedes’ Wednesday Writing Prompt (you can read responses to her prompt HERE), but I wanted to save this poem for the March Runfession. So without further ado….

Forgive me Nike for I have sinned….

I runfess…I really, really, really, really, really miss Saturday morning group runs! Yes, even waking up at 5 or 6 AM. I miss the quiet companionship of the thumping of sneakers on packed dirt, the cool early morning mist and the laughter of bada$$ mother runners.

I runfess…my new sneakers (that arrived just a week before we knew what the term “social distancing” meant) have been very committed to being 6 feet away from people, specifically me! Despite having more time at home, the “extra time” that could have gone into running has not made an appearance.  I blame it on homeschooling, but really it’s probably the stress of what’s going on that has defeated my motivation.

I runfess….in an effort to get out of the pandemic funk, I signed up to Run the Year.  That’s right, I plan to run 2020 miles this year (or part of that if I can get a team together…Bueller? Bueller?).  Because what better way to combat stress and pressure than to commit myself to running a ridiculous number of miles when I have never even gotten close to running before?? I blame the high of finishing the Taji 100 for this one…

I runfess…I’ve also signed up for the March Madness Challenge through Team RWB (Red, White and Blue). Team RWB is a group that supports active military and veterans through physical activity.  Even though I have not been in the military (aka, a civilian), I have a nephew in active duty and numerous friends who have been or are active military.  The concept of staying active for a larger cause resonates with me. I may not be able to help in a tangible way, but this act of solidarity speaks to my social soul.

Well, there you have it…March has definitely come in like a lion this year…here’s to hoping that lamb comes soon and brings toilet paper and hand sanitizer….

 

(c) 2020 iido

 

Runfession #7 – February 2020

February 2020 has come to an end with the bonus “Leap Year” day this past Saturday. Having an “extra” day made me think I had “extra” time to catch up on chores and start our spring cleaning project, maybe run an extra mile or two or 10, however that was not case. But actually, not being able to do those things didn’t stop February from being a Fabulous Month! Thank you to Kate from Aroused by Arête for the “fabulous” prompt for this week!

Forgive me Brooks for I have sinned….

I runfess…I am so so so very very very proud that I was able to complete the Taji 100 this year! I ended up with 103 miles for the month (I was going to do more, but this week was just too busy to get extra miles in). I never would have finished these miles without the support of and group runs with She RUNS this Town/Moms RUN this Town! My running tribe is so totally awesome and truly FABULOUS!

A special THANK YOU goes out to Kristi who started the Taji with me by running 8 miles on the first day. FYI – Kristi only re-started running last fall and had only run 4-5 miles before this inaugural 8-miler. We were doing great this entire month, finishing miles ahead of schedule until Kristi got injured the week before we were to finish our miles. In a true testament to her perseverance and intestinal fortitude, Kristi dug deep and took a lot of advil and we were able to finish the final 2 miles of the Taji 100 together last Sunday.

Shout out to Katie in CA who first introduced me to the Taji 100. She finished her 100 miles just today despite dealing with all sorts of distractions between family, work, house projects, and illness. I never doubted that she wouldn’t get it done!

I runfess…our SRTT/MRTT Cupid Shuffle Step Challenge has also ended. Our team, “Shot Steppers” were in 1st place the first two weeks, but we dropped down to 2nd place last week. Our fearless leader is in Hawaii this week so I’m still waiting to get our grand total for this week. Hopefully we regained our 1st place standing! Not that I’m competitive or anything..oh wait, I runfessed to that last month, didn’t I? Ok, fine – I hope we win because that would be just FABULOUS!!!

I runfess…now, I’m feeling a bit bereft without having a fitness goal for this month. Any suggestions? Drop me a comment!

I runfess…I am going to buy new running shoes. The ones I have can probably last a few more months, but the weather is starting to get warmer and I need new running shoes! (I know that wasn’t really logical, but do I really need an excuse to buy some new running shoes?) Right now, I’m wearing the Brooks Ghost 11 (my 2nd pair). I’ve been happy with this brand and style however I do like checking out the competition! Plus, I have a coupon! All the signs point to the running store this week…

I runfess…as the weather is getting warmer and I’m thinking of doing more running outside, I am actually really glad that we moved to this part of the country. Spring may not smell too good (ask the Amish farmers why) but there is nothing like running on trails and noticing buds on the trees and sprouts coming up from the ground. This time of year is holds so much promise!

Well, this might have been the most FABULOUS February that I have had in a long time! Will it be Marvelous March, next?

UPDATE:

My team “Shot Steppers” won our SRTT Step Challenge!! Woohoo!! February Fabulousness has been Finalized!!!

One “fabulous fail” though, I missed the link up to Marcia’s Healthy Slice with the other Runfessions. <sigh> Oh well, one can’t be too perfect! Keeping grounded and more aware of the date for March…

©️ 2020 iido

Runfession #6 – January 2020 – Ragnar 31 Day Challenge Review

Happy New Year, my dear friends in the Blogosphere! The end of the year always seems to go so fast, hence my reason for missing the December 2019 Runfession. That just means there is SO MUCH MORE I have to runfess this time! Check out more January runfessions at Marcia’s Healthy Slice!

Forgive me Saucony for I have sinned….

I runfess…January has always been a hard time for me to run or workout. When I lived in New Hampshire, I would usually hibernate from November until March, storing fat and sleeping, until the weather got warm enough for outdoor runs. I would usually gain a pound or two or ten but that would usually come off when I got back into my regular running routine. When I was living in California, it never got cold enough to hibernate so my workouts were pretty consistent throughout the year.

We’ve since moved back to the East Coast and have enjoyed having seasons again. However, since getting older, I’ve found that my body really can’t hibernate from running and working out anymore. My metabolism has definitely slowed down and the weight has been clinging to my frame like a baby monkey on it’s mother’s back (or her ass and thighs).

So, I was really excited when my women’s running group joined with Ragnar for the Ragnar 31 Day Challenge for the month of January. We joined as a chapter with a lot of other chapters and other running groups throughout the USA and logged all our workouts for the entire month. If you log in a certain amount, you got certain perks from Ragnar.

My running chapter had 29 participants and we logged 532 activities for the entire month of January! Not bad for a bunch of women, mostly moms, who deal with sick kids, sick partners, snow days, and other calamities that always seem to cluster around cold weather holidays.

Ragnar also provided us with some goodies for a special cross training event. We had ours on January 25, since we got dumped with snow on our original date of January 18th. However, January 25th wasn’t any better. It was a cold and rainy morning and windy, you know the kind that makes the rain come in sideways? We had a lot of cancelations that day, however four of our members braved the weather and we had a fabulous workout! Ragnar provided us with a pair of dice – one that had different types of workouts on it and the other with the number of repetitions of that workout that we needed to do. They took pity on on and let us divide the number of repetitions among the number of people in each group. This was key since I know I would have died doing 80 burpees in a row!

We held the Ragnar event in a parking garage and made use of the ramps for some hill work along with the cross-training challenge. We would run up and down the ramps, head back to the start, roll the dice, do the workout indicated by the dice then head back out to run up and down the ramps again. Overall, we did a 5K and I don’t even know how many jumping jacks, squat jumps, and mountain climbers. Ironically, no one rolled burpees as one of the workouts!

Ragnar really knows how to jump start the new year! I’m so glad my running group partnered with them for this challenge!

I runfess…I am competitive. There I said it. I usually act like I’m not since I’m afraid of failure but I love being pushed past my limits. So I was very excited to have two challenges for February!

First, is the Taji 100. This is my 2nd year seriously doing this challenge. I have my friend, Katie Y in CA, to thank for introducing me to this challenge and keeping me accountable! One hundred miles in the month of February seemed like such a daunting task last year, but this year, it seems more within reach.

Second, is our chapter’s own Cupid Shuffle, put together by one of our chapter leaders, Meghan. This is a team endeavor where groups of 4 keep track of their step count for the month. The team with the most steps for the month win bragging rights!

Logging more miles this month will translate into more steps so for me it will be a win-win. The trick will be finding a balance between getting in miles/steps and keeping up with other obligations (like cleaning, laundry, etc.) ‘cuz if I had a choice between working out and cleaning the bathroom, well, I runfess that the bathroom will lose every time!

©️ 2020 iido

Runfession #5, November 2019 – Gobble Gobble!

Back on track with the November Runfession!! Check out some other Runfessions at Marcia’s Healthy Slice!

Forgive me ASICS for I have sinned…

I runfess that November was actually not a bad running month for me. This was probably due to my extremely low running standards. I ended running outside at least once a week and then doing weights at least once a week. This did not lead to any weight loss or any significant gains in running fitness. On the flip side, I didn’t gain weight or felt like I lost any running stamina.

I runfess that I didn’t enjoy the Girls on the Run (GOTR) race this year. My daughter couldn’t do the program so we registered as community runners. I don’t know if it was our school program or the GOTR program in general, but they really were not very welcoming to girls who were community runners. My daughter trained by herself to get ready for the race. I did run with her a few times but she took it upon herself to run when her siblings were at other activities. Her initiative and determination are qualities that GOTR is supposed to admire however at the race, she didn’t get a medal and was snubbed by the leaders of the GOTR team for pictures. I was proud of my girl and I know she was proud too however I know that being left out was difficult for her.

I runfess that I ran on thanksgiving day, my own personal turkey trot and got this little but of recognition from my Apple Watch, and was so taken by my own awesomeness that I signed up for a SPARTAN STADION RACE!!

I know. I feel a little crazy. I’ve only done one obstacle race before and it was a girls weekend doing the Warrior Dash which is a bit “fluffy” compared to other obstacle races (like Tough Mudder). The Spartan is a step up from Warrior Dash and doesn’t come with a cute Viking hat. At least the one I signed up for isn’t muddy since it’s being held at a stadium but the obstacles still look daunting.

So, this is what happens when I run alone and get to thinking about what things I want to change or do differently for next year.

I’m glad I got all that off my chest! Bring it on December!

©️ iido 2019

Runfession #3, September 2019 – A Running Update

September has come to a close – just in time because I’ve been needing this Runfession! Thanks again to Marcia @Marcia’s Healthy Slice for this forum. Check out this link to read other fabulous Runfessions.

Forgive me Brooks for I have sinned….

I runfess…I only got in seven (7!!) runs this entire month! Between traveling to Texas to visit my cousin and having a sick kid who needed and emergency inhaler…oh, and school starting along with after school activities…oh, and hubby traveling…did I mention I was able to get in seven (7!!) runs despite all this?

I runfess…my 10 mile run this month was probably my best run despite my pace being slower than my average. We had a great group of women for that MRTT run! Michele and I ran for most of miles until the end when she sped ahead since she had to leave. Michele has been so consistent with her training and it showed in this run! I’m so proud of her! She definitely inspired me to finish my miles strong!

I runfess…that towards the end of my 10 mile run, two elderly people (with white hair and everything!) asked me if I was ok or if I needed help! Yes, that’s right. I must have looked particularly more sweaty than usual or maybe like I was going die at the end of this run. On the one hand, I am thankful that other runners and bikers are kind and willing to help someone in need. On the other hand, how bad did I look that these old people thought I needed help? Yikes!

Only two and a half weeks until my half marathon. We have relatives visiting from out of the country so I am aiming for 3 runs for the next two week since I am on hostess duty. I have a long run planned for this Sunday – don’t worry, I’ve already alerted the local nursing home to send out the “oldies but goodies search team” if not back by a certain time!

©️ iido 2019

July Runfession…My first! A Running Update

I originally started this blog to document my running adventures. However, due to Life, this blog has evolved and now includes poetry sometimes about running, more often about my non-running life. This mirrors changes in my own life. While running was so central to who I was for so many years, now that’s shifted and other activities are center stage. But I want to bring running back into limelight hence this new feature called “Runfessions”!

I found out about Runfessions through two running blogs that I follow, Confessions of a Mother Runner and Meditations in Motion. They link up with Marcia’s Healthy Slice (the originator of the Runfession), so that’s what I’m doing too! I’ve always enjoyed reading about other runners and reading about what other runners are thinking and writing about – especially if they are women, mothers, and/or people of color. When I first started running, it was rare to find articles written for or by women, POC, mothers and now there is a lot more!

So here goes…my first Runfession Session!

Forgive me Saucony, for I have sinned….

I Runfess…. that I haven’t been running as much this summer and have missed several group runs. The reasons aren’t that important (basically, kids not being in school) but I haven’t been making it a priority. But that is about to change!

I Runfess….I signed up for two more races! The Hershey Half Marathon in October and the Hot Chocolate 15K in April 2020. Time to get going on my training plan!

I Runfess….I don’t have a training plan! I’m relying on my BRF, Michele, to keep me on target. She’s been doing great with her training. I’m pretty sure she’s going to beat her PR at Hershey this year.

Is that enough? My running sole (see what I did there?) is feeling lighter already!!

©️ iido 2019