First Time

(An ode to my older daughter)

The first time I saw you

I thought

Perfection

Your stand up hair

Your knowing eyes

Your pouty lips

Your teddy bear belly

Your crinkled toes

Your peaceful breathing

I made you

(With help of course!)

I grew you

As I continue to watch you

In wondrous

Perfection

You hold me

You teach me

You admire me

You humble me

You forgive me

You better me

I am broken

I am healed

With each First Time

You remind me

You are already

Perfection

I should just stand back

And watch

©️iido 2018

******

My older daughter joined me for a group run with my MRTT chapter. It was her first time running with me and my running friends. One of the other moms also brought her daughter (which is what inspired my daughter to join us). While this run was more of a walk, it was refreshing to see this route – that I had run many times before – through my daughter’s eyes.

I remember running in high school gym class. You needed to run a mile in under 20 minutes. We ran the laps indoors. I was the last one to come in at 19 minutes. And I collapsed on the floor when I crossed the finish line. One of the other students (Rob H – whatever happened to him?) came over to see if I was ok. I felt like I was going to die – from exertion and embarrassment.

I hope my daughter will never have to experience the Double E. Right now, she doesn’t absolutely love running (lol – in fact, her runs are more like “walking with some short running intervals”) but she is not daunted by running. I can see her getting stronger (in body and mind) and that sense of accomplishment at this age is priceless. The first time I realized that I could overcome the Double E was in my late 20s when I actually trained and ran my first 5k.

They say you never forget your first time – first run, first race, first PR. What running first do you remember? Was it a happy, sad or maybe even a double E memory? I’m looking forward to more runs with my daughter. She is my inspiration!!

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Clouds

A poem inspired by Pic and a Word Challenge #146. While Patrick’s optimism shines through in his writing, mine took a slightly different turn…Thanks for another great prompt, Patrick!

*******

Amorphous clouds engulf me –

My true hand unseen

My heart frozen, unloved

My breath stilled and unworthy

My solid form deemed weak

What was supposed to shade me

Protect me

From the bleaching hanging sun

Now hurts my skin with its

Wispy viper tendrils

I thought you were my friend

But I missed the forecast for

Cloudy with a chance of

selfish entitlement.

Mountain Air Moving

(Haiku)

Mountain air moves me

Leaving city hurts behind

Nature heals my heart

**********

Trail Review: Shirley Canyon Trail, Tahoe-Truckee, CA

I had resolved to incorporate more physical activity in my daily life. I’ve come to realize that the “waiting for the perfect alignment of weather, schedules, and motivation” work out method was really NOT working for me – hence my weeks (months!) of not running.

I usually don’t get any workouts done on my vacations but I had planned ahead this time and made sure we had more than just restaurant reservations on our itinerary. While I don’t think the hikes and walks totally counteracted my indulgent eating, I did get to see some spectacular sights and I felt fantastic closing my circles!

The Tahoe-Truckee area has fabulous trails that wind up the majestic Sierra Nevada mountains. While beautiful to look at, the water was still freezing cold despite 70+ degree weather.

Climbing the hills above Donner Lake.

Climbing the hills above Donner Lake.

Hiking the Shirley Canyon Trail.

Hiking the Shirley Canyon Trail.

The Shirley Canyon Traila was a terrific trail for our group of 4 adults and 6 kids aged 12 to 3. We did a two mile out and back route on this trail due to the two sets of little legs we had with us. I have to say that both my 5 and 3 year old did terrific on this trail. There is a section where you basically have to climb over rocks to stay on the path. They clambered up those rocks like they were part mountain goat (must be on my hubby’s side!). We only had 1 serious scrape that needed first aid and minimal whining!

This trail is also very dog friendly. I was surprised by how many dogs were channeling their inner mountain goat on the rocks!

The trail had two waterfalls – one about a third of the way in and the other around the 0.8 mile mark. We turned back at that point but if we had continued we would have reached Shirley Lake (about 2.3 miles one way) and then eventually have reached High Camp, part of the Squaw Valley Ski Area (about 4.4 miles total one way). Once at High Camp, hikers can take the ski lift tram back to the bottom for free. Once my kiddos get older, we will definitely attempt to reach Shirley Lake and High Camp.

During this hike, I couldn’t help but think of the families who traverse the dangers of their country of origin and walk towards, what they believe, would be a better life in the United States, only to be torn apart at our southern border. As a mother and an immigrant, the anger and sadness of this injustice keeps me awake at night. While I cherished the time I get to spend with my kids before, during and after this hike, I mourn for the families who are separated due to the current US politics. Whatever side of the debate you’re on, if you are a parent and an American, I hope you realize that this is the antithesis of what our country, our flag and our Constitution stands for.

©️ iidorun 2018

Focus (A Poem)

It’s easy to lose it

And end up wandering

Or wondering

The shoes of my mind

Scattered

Like questions asked by a precious if not so precocious child

Why why why

Whispering like leaves caught underfoot

Who have no say

As to where they go

Running used to find it

Embody it

Relish in the discipline of it

Until the leaves got smashed

Surprisingly stuck to shoes

In my mind

Slipping

Scaring

Scarring

So that when it’s found again

(And it will be)

It will be changed

The path is the same

The leaves underfoot

The shoes

Now tied tight

As my breath

Held

Focus

Let go

And begin again.

Written in response to Pic and a Word Challenge #144.

©️iidorun 2018

Intertwined

(Written in response to the #PicandaWord weekly challenge prompt, from Pix to Words, 12/25/16.)

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The woman I am

Is the woman I was

The quiet one

The smart one

The bookworm

The one who ran a high school mile in 20 minutes 

The woman I am

Is the woman I was

The hands in my back pocket, 

I can conquer the world,

Let the party begin,

I can pull off an A paper in 4 hours Co-ed

Who wasn’t self aware enough

Who wasn’t practiced enough

To know alcoholic lies 

The woman I am

Is the woman I was

The trusting in a good world 

How did this happen to me

Despite my negative words

Against my feminist will

It must be my fault

Forgive me, understand me lover. 

The woman I am

Is the woman I was

The grieving mother

The don’t get too close so it doesn’t hurt mother

The oh it could be fun and easy mother

The I didn’t realize boys were so different mother

The stay my baby a little a lot longer mother

The woman I am

Is the woman I was

Angry and hurt

Confused yet hopeful

Spurned into action

Despite fears of rejection

I am the intersection of

My gender

My ethnicity

My religion

My race

The intertwining of identity and history

The woman I am

Is the woman I was

Is the woman I will become
©iido, 2016