Change Scale – A Quadrille and Running Update

I stare at you

And wiggle my toes

Willing you to change

With my mind

While my body remains

On the Couch

Softly spreading

Creaking with complaints

I finally get up to walk

To the fridge

for a cold beverage.

Change is thirsty work.

De Jackson hosts the 2019’s first Quadrille Monday at dVerse (#71) with the theme: Change. Another apropos theme for the start of the year. Thank you De Jackson!

As with a lot of people, I posted last week my health goals for the year. So despite the 30 degree weather, I went for a short run by myself while my kids were at their horse riding lessons. It was so cold that my breath never warmed up enough for me to see it, but I did feel pretty bada$$ running in the cold. Like I was a real runner and nothing was going to stop me from a run.

Of course, I am a “real runner” but my recent spate of not prioritizing running has made me feel somewhat of an imposter. I mean, isn’t family supposed to come before running? And what about my passion of writing? What I’m really striving for is balance! Not the sometimes elusive scale balance (holding an ice cream cone in each hand does not a balanced scale make!) but the even more rare, life balance. Where, oh where, is that life balance? Maybe it’s hiding under the running shoes….

©️ iido 2019

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January Play Date – A Poem

Janus said, “Let’s go out and play!

I heard it was a holiday.”

Maybe it is for you, old foe,

But today, that is something I must forgo.

No time to play when I peruse my face

And see the lines that spell disgrace

Of worries and what could have been

There is no fun when I look within

But Janus, oh! that crafty man!

He looked ahead and had a plan,

“My friend, there’s nothing you can do.

What done is done! You’ve paid your due.

Look forward! See! The future’s bright!

Now is the time to do what’s right.

The past might mark your face with sorrow.

But you still control what happens tomorrow.”

I smiled at his two faced wisdom

It’s true that time rules this kingdom

No matter what path I chose to take

The fun of life are the decisions I make

Whether good or bad, hindsight will see

And foresight might prevent a tragedy

But to refuse to play is to die right then

We know it will happen just not when

So I say to Janus with a smile,

“You’re right, let’s play! I’ll stay awhile.

I won’t worry about the why and what if.

I’ll enjoy the present because…it’s a gift.”

This poem was written for d’Verse Poetics: Time and What If. Thank you, Merrill, for this timely prompt!

Time has always been my nemesis, being a chronic procrastinator. Maybe on some subconscious level, I think it has to do with my ambivalence towards change. Or maybe I am just lazy. Getting started or changing course has always been a struggle. But once I’m on that path, then I am fully committed and seldom have I strayed from the task.

I know these characteristics have their positives and negatives. For example, in the past, my focus on running has been all consuming to the detriment of spending time with family or self care. Since dealing with some medical issues, I’ve had to switch paths since I was not able to run as much. But now, I struggle with incorporating some running (or any exercise) in my daily life since my focus has shifted.

Does time only allow us to focus on one thing at a time? Research on attention point out that multi-tasking is a myth and that people are really only meant to focus on one thing at a time. So those of us who suffer from FOMO and procrastination are in a double bind.

I don’t have a solution to this quandary despite finding myself in the midst of it for most of my adult life. I’ve come to accept that it’s ok to miss out on some things as long as what I am focusing on is important to me or important to someone I love (that’s the mom listening for hours about trains and pandas and other things instead of cleaning the bathroom). So yes, I chose play over work (to my hubby’s dismay). And I try not to let those what ifs creep in.

©️ iido 2019

Fireside Chats – A Cascade Poem

He said, “Wicked!”

“Chill,” she said

“It’s a slow burn. Wait for the flames to gather.”

It was a Radical Idea at the time

“Face to face?”

He said, “Wicked!”

They tried it, taking turns

Taking breaths when it got too hard

“Chill,” she said

Yet their fervor created a spark

Embers spread via mouth to mouth with tea times and tupperware

“It’s a slow burn. Wait for the flames to gather.”

This post is a “two-fer”! At the Go Dog Go Cafe, their Tuesday Writing Prompt, Devereaux and Beth Amanda requested: Use the words “wicked chill” in any form of poetry or prose. While Victoria over at dVerse Poetics, thoughtful of the catastrophic wildfires in California, asked us to think aboutthe many other possibilities that apply to fire, and bring us the results of your burning creativity“.

Despite the seemingly conflicting mandates, my little poem seeks to illustrates how one spark – an idea, a change in behavior or outlook – can create a fire, a fervor for that change. There are many things I would like to change right now. My flame may flickering , but it will not go out!

https://youtu.be/J2kDsqGeoLU

No Need to Wait – A Haibun

Raindrops on my window pane remember another time, another storm, another breath of waiting. It was still new and exciting back then. Now, it’s just worrisome as time goes faster and faster.

Waiting for that look

When you turn your head and wave

Not today – you’ve grown

Imelda at dVerse hosted Haibun Monday with the theme: Waiting. As a mom, I spend a lot of time waiting for my kids – to get ready in the morning, to get them from school, to do their chores; also waiting while they are at their numerous after school activities. I usually try to catch up on correspondence during those few minutes or use that time to type out thoughts for a poem. Sometimes, I just sit and listen to music or to the silence before the kids fill the space.

The picture above is of my older daughter doing a ropes course. See her, on the right, in the trees? Such a brave girl! I realize as they get older, they won’t need me to wait for them anymore. They might go with their friends or (gasp!) be able to drive themselves to/from school, activities. The nine months of waiting for them seemed to last forever and now the time is going too fast! Soon, I will no longer need to wait.

©️ iido 2018

To the Moon and Back – A Quintilla and Quintain

A Quintilla

To the moon and back, I promised

No matter if I’m demolished

My child, I will search high and low

I’ll follow wherever you go

No fear – for you, I can do this

A Quintain

I promised to the moon and back

My love brings me to this journey

I won’t come back ’til what I lack

Returns with me in a hurry

Dear child, there’s no need to worry

Hélène provides another beautiful picture prompt for “What do you see? Weekly Challenge”. The image reminded me of the children’s book, “Guess How Much I Love You” which had the phrase “to the moon and back” and these poems were birthed!

I also tried to incorporate the writing challenge from Grace at D’Verse Poets to try writing an English Quintain or a Spanish Quintilla (too late to add it to Mr. Linky). These two forms are similar – poems with five (5) lines each – however the Quintilla keeps an eight (8) syllable count per line while the Quintain has no such constraints. Also, the Quintain follows the rhyming form ABABB while the Quintilla can follow AABBA or ABBAA or ABAAB or ABABA.

I am not sure these are my best work as they sound quite limerick-ish and that wasn’t my intent, but I had to write something! At least I didn’t start it with “There once was a mom from South Philly…”

©️ iido 2018

Winking – A Quadrille Acrostic Poem

While I laughed my best fake laugh

Instead of joining in the conversation

Nestling your hand in mine

Knowing I was only there because of you

I saw your eyes widen then flicker

Noticing the beauty across the table

Giving your best singular smile

This there such a thing a Quadrille Acrostic Poem? Well, there is now! De Jackson (aka WhimsyGizmo) at dVerse Poets requested a Quadrille (a poem with exactly 44 words) using the word “wink”. I used “winking” as the acrostic word – hope that counts!

This poem continues the theme of relationships that seems to be prominent on my blog this week. I wonder what the universe is trying to tell me?

No Chocolate for Breakfast – A Quadrille

I witness it’s beginning

Eyes squinting

Lips frowning

Body quivering

Then the giant deluge of emotions burst from your body

It’s too early for you to understand

It’s too early for me to explain

So I hold you while we both dissolve into tears

Kim at dVerse Poets requested quadrilles (poems with exactly 44 words) using the word “early”. Here is my submission.

©️ iido 2018